Real disappointment often sneaks silently. Before you notice it, the heart is already withered.

The sun fell again, leaving the sky with that splendid thick red and orange. Another day I had waited for you on the sill.

I jumped down the window with a light foot, heading towards the cooking room. You sweetie had prepared so much “little dried fish” -- my favorite -- for me, before you put on your white working suit and left with your companion. I knew there was someone needing your help again, but I was sure you would come back as before. Most of the time before the sunset, sometimes after the sun fell and rose some times, but always before the big bright moon was eaten up.

The sun fell fourteen times as I counted. Every day, there were so many people coming in and out, but every time I saw their faces, my heart painfully shrunk once. Not you. Not you. I couldn’t drive the idea out of my head that, maybe, you don’t want me anymore. Worse still, my little dried fish was running out. I tried my best to hold back myself from biting your fluffy stuff on the ground -- I just wouldn’t want to see the worm-like deep frown on your chubby face!

That damn red ball had already disappeared and reappeared another seven times. I had to admit that I bit that fluffy stuff nevertheless as I was so hungry: The dried fish was eaten up and my stomach kept yelling. After swallowing pieces of that furry stuff, I felt very uncomfortable. Cruel you! How could you leave me alone at home for so long a time?

Thanks to you, I had seen all the different shapes of the moon. Yesterday, I dreamed of you, fatso. It was about the first time we met. You picked me from so many cats at first sight. Since then, we have been staying together all the time. Every night, you would hold me in your warm embrace, caressing my head lightly until I heard your steady breath. I could even feel your heartbeat, which is the same as mine. But later I saw you, breathless, lying in a white room where there were so many strange machines around your now bony body -- I was sure now, that we could not meet anymore.

At this moment, I have no strength to jump down the sill now, so I decide to lie on it forever. The sun falls again, with that pale, fading red and orange, but this time it would not rise again in my world. So, I struggle to memorize it as much as possible, as you once said when the sky was turning red and orange, you would come home from work. But this time, you did not.

——A true story of a doctor’s late cat.